It has been over a year since I last blogged. Life gets in the way of blogging, especially when I have been busy creating life! Baby number 3 arrived in April 2009 and life has been a whirlwind ever since.
I feel so blessed and so thankful to have my babies. They are my entire life and there is no place I would rather be than with them 24/7. Yet, I constantly am asked "how can you stand being home with your kids all the time?" That question does not even make sense to me! If I didn't want to be with them, I wouldn't have had them!
When I think of all the women and mothers that I know who feel that by giving birth, they have already done enough for the children and now they need to get back to their "own lives", it makes me cringe! What life do I even need beyond the children? I just don't understand anyone yearning for more than the children...
So when other mums say to me, "how can you stand being at home 24/7 in kidland? don't you want to go to work to escape the hell? doesn't your husband get mad if you don't work?", these comments make me sick. I can't imagine being away at work all day, and not being able to play with my kids and dance, sing, do crafts, baking, have outings...how much I would miss! And for what? So I could excel at my CAREER? Whatever. Women who say "oh my career is still important to me", have no clue what self sacrifice is and that when you have a child, you become secondary in life and a career should take a back burner until the children are in school full time at least.
I firmly believe the first 5 yrs of a child's life are important enough to warrant a mum or a dad being home full time and raising them.
Ok and then I get people saying to me, "oh we can't afford to do that." BULL! These are people with car payments or large mortgages or every electronic item under the sun....get a 2nd hand car or take the bus! Move to a smaller area and get a cheaper home! Stop worrying about all the materialism you HAVE to have and HAVE to work for....please! Your children come first and if it means being poorer or going with less, then so be it! Women just use it as an EXCUSE to shirk their parenting off onto daycares or sitters as a way to get out of raising the kids themselves. Hence the whole, "oh i HAVE to work" excuse. No, no mother HAS to work, there is always another way so that she can be home with the kids, always. The simple fact is not enough know what it means to be selfless and give over their own lives to the children.
And it makes me angry and sad.
Then there are the single mothers. They say "oh I HAVE to work, I can't just live on welfare!" Well, um, yes they can if they know how to budget! What is more important...going with less and being there for your kids or having someone else raise your kids while you work work work to pay that person and have more STUFF or a bigger and better home?
Ok, so let's say welfare is not enough to even get by on...then why can't these women take jobs that are LIVE IN positions so that they can be home with the kids still 24/7? Lots of jobs out there come with accommodation if you have the desire and drive to look for them...managing small country motels or inns, being the caretaker of a campsite, being the caretaker of a wildlife shelter, being a groundsperson/bookeeper/overseer for a wealthy landowner who provides a guest cottage to live in....so many options. I could go on and on. The fact is though that single women or many women in general do not want to move heaven and earth to be at home with their kids.
They WANT to work in order to not have to be with them. Some might say, "well what is wrong with a mother still wanting a life outside of the home?" Nothing, once the kids are developing their own lives and starting school....but everything is wrong with it when a mother cannot see that she does not get to have a life outside the home once she has chosen to give birth! The children need their mothers! But too many mothers are all about ME ME ME ME.
And any husband worth his salt will praise his wife for staying home and raising the kids and looking after the home! Only losers get mad if their wives don't get out there to work! What a backwards, horrible, selfish view!
There is my rant for the day! :)
